Not Everything Is Sexy

excerpt from a previous blog on MyIslamFeed by DD

In 1984, I guess life is a lie, a complete and utter lie… girls in blue sashes are not really "girls", they're not like other girls…not sexy.

My mother is coming to visit, I'm happy and…nervous. Why, nervous? My mother is 76 years old and smokes…

…I'm thinking of a poster I saw once in grade ten in the English class room; it reminds me (now as then) of my mother.  My mother was a smoker then, she still is…never tried to quit, as far as I know. The poster says, "Smoking is [not] sexy"; the woman in the poster is 50ish with dark lank hair. She's not so old…but has unsightly dark bags under her eyes, a gaping mouth, lots of smoker's wrinkles, and looks sexless/genderless. Regardless of the health risks, smoking stinks! (Read on)

My mother has been smoking for over 40 years, maybe 45 years…she is 76 and still smoking. Don't ever start smoking, is my first advice; second advice, stop smoking as soon as possible; stop at once, you'll thank me if you do!(If you're still young and beautiful).

Imagine if you could see your before and after pictures NOW?!! Believe me you'd kick the smoking habit.

I'm afraid that I'll be shocked to see my mother after not having seen her in many years. I'm nervous that I'll be seen in public with her…but that's wrong! She's my mother after all! Whatever qualms I have, will have to be set aside…being the irrational fears only of an admittedly selfish, selfcentred woman in midlife...

This brings me to the topic of words…and people's use of the word "sexy".  As I was reading a while back in a famous person's blog, or tweets...language changes with "newspeak" (what's called usage)…this is nothing new. Languages always keep evolving.  It is the nature of languages and of society; because it's the people who use language (as opposed to any other species of animal/man/ape). I'm a Muslim creationist (as opposed to believing in the creationism as per the Bible I believe in the Qur'anic version of events; including the 'Big Bang' neatly described therein), not an evolutionist, I think language proves that ppl are ppl and apes are apes, and the two never were one. Kind of like men are always men, women are women, except for some children who are born with male and female organs, but take one look and usually you know a boy or a girl; best leave the internal stuff to the doctors…

 Being humans we are rather fickle, I think.

 Around this time, we are at a point where we could be losing much of our language, with the need for more and more tech in our lives, to communicate with family or friends, to keep old friends close, to ignite new relationships it's a must! Ipod, etc, etc. (I can feel my China Wall of resistance going up again!..) Only a few years ago, it happened that words became not "gender- specific", which is a good thing. Better to have a female doctor, or a mailwoman; I think this works for most Muslims, in fact, and proves in a way that Islam never was against females, or women's equality.

Why is everything sexy all of a sudden? The answer seems obvious, like a red rose means love, and a white

one means friendship…Everything is NOT sexy! But people, especially celebrities these days… everywhere one goes… reads a newspaper, a blog, or sees an interview someone famous is saying, (something) is quote, unquote SEXY??

It's in vogue to do that, simply "following a fad". "The more things change the more things stay the same" couldn't be more true in 2009 than 1989 (the year I embraced Islam).  :)

I saw a video on YouTube, the Junoon band (an Arab, or Pakistani band, perhaps) and Salman, one of the members, the ringleader according to the description presented, but a woman, perhaps an interviewer, or one of the band members as well, an overweight middle aged woman, older in a sexy kind of way actually, kind of overpowers the conversation. They are friendly, yes…sit eating at a very nicely decorated table, in a wonderful looking room, then begin discussing the Qur'an…

Think for a minute (pause), a group are guest with another famous person, perhaps an interviewer, they feel relaxed, at ease, and perhaps with some pre dinner drinks, a little giddy…

I caution people not to discuss the Qur'an without knowledge; it's very dangerous for one's faith; especially taking important religious matters, and issues lightly. 

…the talk turns to the woman reading Qur'an one night, and how she describes what she was reading at the time, as "Sexy". Other members, probably 'Salman', laugh; he is seated on her right, while she is at the head of the table. Their shameless laughter surrounding a book which Muslims hold dear is thoughtless and perverse…or isn't it??

Some things just are not possible. It's not possible to call a holy book such names, or give such descriptions to holy books (even with all the comparisons or contrasts Muslims or Christians make about each other's holy book, which I don't personally want to do; I think it's been overdone, or at least everyone has heard these comparisons, the information is already out there, so enough said…)

This is a misuse of the language, in that language is meant to convey a message…a message which should reflect one's true perception…or else, reflect what one is feeling. But, if for example a person lies to his wife, and tells her she is "ugly "is unfair and (maybe also) not a reflection of reality. Now in courts of law this could be considered "emotional abuse", which proves that in a society the rules dictate what is and what isn't acceptable. It's not acceptable to use random or precise words at will to disparage, hurt or otherwise harm others: lying, defamation, and so on are all considered illegal, in fact.

But who, society, or the individual is supposed to dictate to "us" what kind of language, or what use of language is proper, legal, illegal, etc.? Apparently there are laws in place already, in some cases…such as "emotional abuse", "defamation of character", etc. Probably, more types will be added in future, as new legal battles arise, and new precedents are set…let's hope it will be for the betterment of society and to facilitate good will and harmony among the people and groups. (Remember how hated the word "nigger" was, how controversial the word, "black" became, and how "colored" was "in", then it was "out")

Could calling holy books "Sexy", or certain verses "Sexy" become an issue of legal rights for some against others' claims of 'freedom of speech', or freedom of "liespeak"? Just as defamation of character is wrong, could defamation of the character of a book be wrong also?

Finally, could Muslims, in the future, have some solid ground at last in the fight against Salman Rushdie's, "the Satanic Verses", for defaming the character (it is a holy revered book) of the Holy Qur'an?  

I can count on one thing for sure, my mother will never change: beauty (may be) only skin deep, but mothers are always the most 'beautiful' ppl we know personally…

I'm really looking forward to this family visit…Mom, I love you!